Opening up old wounds only causes deeper scars....

Not a very happy bunny atm. Hoping that some nicer weather and a few hardcore runs will cheer me up!
Hope everyone is well.
:D

Some places should come with a warning.....

Hello,

Today has been a very interesting day.

First of all, I spilt coffee on part of my keyboard, and so some keys don’t work, or they add lovely groups of letters after them. Thanks for that guys. I’m gonna wait until tomorrow before I start to panic, but typing on this thing is rather annoying.

Second of all, me and a friend went to the local Chinese buffet place in Toledo. There’s only one of these places in Toledo, and after this visit, I know why.

When we first walked in, there was only two other customers; we didn’t think much of this as, being a Sunday, a lot of places aren’t even open on a Sunday, so I thought it maybe just a slow day.

We sat down, and was told we could eat whatever we wanted. Awesome. However, there wasn’t actually a lot of food under the hot plate. No problem, as many of these places cook and replace the food as it goes along. We ate the first plate. A bit cold, but no problem. However, we there for half an hour , and no additional food had been put down. A bit strange, but maybe they were just having a break? They were sitting by the bar, chatting away, but no problem.

After two plates, we heard the sounds of cooking. Hmm, maybe they are making more food? We waited for a bit before we tried the dessert. They did indeed bring out food; but not for us, the customers. Four sat down and began to eat some kind of soup and meat that they had made for themselves.

So, we decided to try the desserts. The door to the freezer wouldn’t open. “Ask them how the door opens my” my friend asked me.

“I can’t”, I replied, “they’re eating.”

We waited for a while, and then asked for the bill, after watching the poor chef, who didn’t get to eat any of the soup, put cling film over the remaining food on the “hot” (more like cold) plate. Funnily enough, the bill came with no real wait- no qualms about taking our money then.

We left.

On a side note- the sushi was quite nice.

:D

Like swift water, an active mind never stagnates...

Hola,
Today has been an absolutely gorgeous day weather-wise. It's still as cold as anything in the flat, but as soon as you step outside in the street, you can feel WARMTH. It was really sunny, blue skies, the works. Not a cloud to be seen.
I went for a walk down by the river (again), and fell even more in love with Toledo. I've got 5 more months left, but I'm already getting the feeling that I won't want to go back to England. It gets a bit depressing when I think about it too much.
Anyways, I took some more pictures down by the river:


On a side note, ever since I moved into my flat I've been ill- cold-like symptoms, but they keep coming back. I'll be ok for a day, and then the next day I'll be sneezing like noone's business. I'm wondering if it's the cold of the flat, it wouldn't surprise me...I walk around in two pairs of socks, all of my clothes (well not ALL of them, but always a t-shirt, jumper and then hoody at least...), getting in and out of the shower kills me, and I have to be under my covers constantly otherwise I'm cold. This cannot be normal...
:D

Not saying goodbye, but instead, "Hasta luego!" (see you later!)

Hey people,
I'm just going to a "goodbye party" so I feel this is the right time to post this blog, especially seeing as most/everyone has gone now.....
This is the crazy thing about Erasmus. You meet people who you would never have imagined meeting before in your life. People from all different countries, different walks of life. Some you meet and think you'll become fast friends, and that sadly doesn't happen. But the most surprising and amazing thing for me is when you meet someone who you at first thing that you have nothing in common with- but you end up becoming very very good friends.
Now, I guess that is a life thing too, but there's something about Erasmus that is unique- you're all in the same position. You've all come to a foreign place, with a foreign language, and you've all been thrown into the deep end.
Some people only come here for 5 months. I'm here for a total of 10 months, which for me although at first it seems like a lot, having been here for the first half it seems to have gone sooo quickly. I'm not sure that I will want to leave when it comes to it. Actually, what am I saying, OF COURSE I won't want to leave. I always miss England, my family and my friends, but living here and having this opportunity is something that I may welll never have again.
Anyway, back to the goodbyes. Some of them have been horrible. One of my best friends here has already left me (you know who you are :( ) and she was someone who I always talked to (about anything), we went out, we went to Salamanca, we made an awful lot of memories. And there are my flatmates too, who put up with me :D and who have made my experience here so far very special.
It's very sad to say goodbye especially when you think that some of these people you may never see again, but I hope that some day, I will. (Also, you know who you are, we definately WILL be seeing each other again ;))
Anyways, that's it for now I guess. Hope you all have a great night!
:D

I have returned....with a new flat!

Helloooooo,
So I haven't blogged for a while! I don't really have a legitimate excuse, just the fact that I've been extremely lazy/went back to England for Christmas/had exams to revise for and sit/had to move flats/had to say goodbye to everyone :( I've got a few blogposts that I need to do, and I'm not sure that I'll be able to do them in chronological order as everything has happened so fast since I got back after Christmas!
I guess the first thing I'll share is my new flat :D I was perfectly happy with my old flat, and I loved my landlords (a couple) as I never had any problems with them and I felt like if I had any problems I could go and ask and they would sort it (like when the toilet lock broke and I got locked inside- that was a scary time!). So why did I move? Well, a lot of the Erasmus students only stay for 5 months, and that's what my German flatmates did. So, it was either stay in my old flat and look for two more flat mates, or, I had the offer of moving in with my English friend higher up in El Casco (the historic part of Toledo) which was a lot closer to the university. Also, something else which really motivated me was the fact that this new flat has an oven. For some reason, and I never realised, ovens aren't really on high priority in Spanish flats. I found this extremely odd, but I've realised that it's not that uncommon. However, it did impede me from cooking a lot of things that I used to in England :(
Another huge motivation? My bedroom has a double bed :D I have never had a double bed before, so that for me was a huge luxury that I couldn't pass up.
Sooooo, here is my bedroom:

And this is the living room:


(I apologise for the lighting it's quite a sunny day today!)
So now I am living with two lovely girls, one English, and one that isn't English but has lived and studied in England for several years. :D (although we are worried we're gonna just end up speaking English and not Spanish, nooo que pena....)
The building is a lot different to my old one. It's a lot bigger, and there's a lot more residents (in my old building there were only three flats, so you were unlikely to bump into anyone). So it's more of an adventure going up and down the stairs, will I bump into anyone :O There's a lady on my floor who looks to be in her sixties, and she's wears this huuuuuuge fur coat....The older ladies always get dressed up in Spain, even if they're just going to the local food shop, but I guess that's a different blog post....
The only thing I have against this flat so far is how cold it is, especially at night. However, it's cold in general in Toledo at the moment, probably not by England standards, but it definately is by Spain standards. I'm just hoping it warms up soon!
:D

The beauty of Toledo, is in the eyes of everyone...

Hey people,

This is a post I've been meaning to do for a while (well, since I started this blog, but let's not go into that...) Today I finally had the chance to go and take pictures down by the river, where I go running, and every time I go there I think, "I MUST come here with my camera so that I can take photos" but then another day goes by and it doesn't happen.
Well, today it did happen. I've been in a very foul mood of late, and because I was woken up at 6 and then couldn't get back to sleep, I thought I would get up and go for a walk to try and make myself feel a bit better, instead of just vegging which is what I normally do.
So I went, camera in hand, down to the river. Sadly, the light was a bit too bright on one side of the river, where the views are more spectaculer, so the photos there didn't work out very well :( But I wanted to give an idea of the place that I'm lucky enough to be living in right now.
I took quite a few photos, so I don't think I'll put them all. But here we go:



This is the view you get when you look away from Toledo. I think this kind of view of the fields, looks to me what I think of as typical Spain- even though it's winter, it looks barren, dry almost, but with a few trees dotted around- I find it really beautiful, and I find myself staring at this view a lot. (Although I must point out, as I've found out since being here, EVERYONE has a different idea of what they think is "typical Spain"- some people think the south is Spain, whereas those from the north see the middle and south of Spain as "heathen" places. Not their words, but that's the impression I get when speaking to them.)



I walk across the bridge to go for my run and to get out of the city to go to the train station- beautiful right?



Part of the track where I run :)



Part of the bridge, I don't know what the name is of this one but it'll be "Puerta de" something, which basically means "door". This is what I love about Toledo- these buildings are from medieval times, when the visigoths were around, and yes they have all had some kind of restoration to some degree, but they look like they were literally built yesterday, even if the style's a bit oldy-worldy. Everything feels so clean, nothing feels old and horrible, you actually want to look at things here.



View looking up to the city- see what I mean about it being medieval? It looks far more impressive than anything JRR Tolkien could have dreamt up. (I'm referencing the Two Towers film, where the city they have the battle in loooked a bit similar to this) and the design was very typical of the time, as it all came down to safety- from up there you could see your enemies from far away, and it was a much better option to defend from above. Those clever Toledanos!



This is part of the river, I'm not quite sure what is happening there as I don't know anything about the geography of rivers, but it mesmerised me. The river was almost being sucked down, really fast, it looked really violent. Whether it's natural or not doesn't make any difference to me. Considering my worst fear is drowning, I don't think it was a good idea for me to stay there for too long, but for some reason I couldn't pull myself away!

My main wish is to take pictures of this part of the city during sunset hours, which is mainly when I run, and it is SO beautiful it is unreal. So that is my next task, especially before I leave for England (which is in 19 days yipee!). I am meaning to take a few more, and better, pictures of "el casco", the actual city, but I don't enjoy taking pictures of buildings as much as I do as scenary, so we shall see!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy the pictures!

:D

"Talents are best nurtured in solitude, but character is best formed in the stormy billows of the world."

Hey people,

So while I’ve been sitting here trying to do work (and in some part succeeding, in some part not) I’ve been thinking quite a bit about what it that constitutes “character” in a person, whether it be strength of character or weakness, and just about the mentality that some people have. This may well be a bit of a rambling post, and I want to start off by saying- I am in no way a perfect person. I make mistakes all the time, I say the wrong thing, I do the wrong thing, and sometimes I don’t like to admit it. But in the end, I like to think that I admit, and I take responsibility for my words and for my actions.

So, to begin. This thinking about character and mentality has somewhat come from my experiences here. Not all, but sometimes I have to think really hard since being here. When I came here, I knew that it would be in some way like I was starting university all over again. Of course, I was coming to a whole new university, in a completely different country, and there would be new people. I was terrified. After two years at my English university, I finally felt settled. I had friends there, but I also had a social group at home. I had a very active social life, and I loved (and still do love) my friends. I felt comfortable. I was starting over completely.

Terrifying. Having been here for three months today, I do feel settled. I have an active social life. But, do I have close friends? I would have to say- not many at all. There are some people here that I would consider friends, and I talk to them a lot and tell them things. But closeness takes time.

There are also those people here who I cannot for the life of me figure out. I admit that I rely a lot on my first impression of people, which can often be to my disadvantage- I guess you could say that I judge very quickly, and sometimes, I find that I am COMPLETELY wrong with what I thought about someone. I may think that they are an idiot when I first meet them, and then find that actually, they are nice, funny, someone I want to be around. (For the record, people when they first meet me often think that I think that I am always right, or that I am “up myself”, which couldn’t be further from the truth). So I know that first impressions don’t always count.

But, saying that, there is something to be said for how someone behaves when you first meet them, or for what you think initially. There have been a couple of people here who at first, I didn’t like. Then, gradually, I start to like them and tell myself, you were completely wrong about them. But then, as it turns out, I was right the first time. That is not to say that I am hugely surprised, and I don’t feel I have lost any great friends in this way. It just reinforces the feeling that I should trust my gut.

There are some people who I have met who I just cannot understand why they behave the way they do. The gossip, for example. This as a Erasmus year, for some reason means that people feel that they can go crazy, and act out way beyond their boundaries that they would have in their home countries, and for whatever it is ok. But what I seem to notice is that people are WAY more interested in what you do here than when they are at home. So the fact that people do more “scandalous” things, and that people are more likely to know and talk about it, equals a disaster for some people. Hell, you don’t even have to do anything and you get gossiped about. I’ve been told that I did something the other night that I DID NOT do. It’s quite amazing to be told you did something you didn’t know you did when you were fully conscious. Deary me!

I’ve been told that this isn’t actually gossip, but it’s people who are immature and don’t think about what they say. Hmm’k. If you are immature, that means you have a REASON for why you act the way you do- but i have never heard “immature” as a character flaw being used in a court of law, nor does it get you off in any normal everyday situations.

I was asked last night, “Surely you did some things like that when you were young and immature?” And honestly, I don’t think I have gone round saying things that really aren’t true. I have never, no matter what anyone believes, spread rumours about people. I am 20 years old, one of the youngest here in fact, and I feel much more like an adult than the way a lot of people act here.

Apparently it’s because people on the continent don’t tend to live outside of mummy and daddy’s house until they leave university, and this is the first time they have been away from home. Ok, so I can kind of understand that. But do you not learn any kind of maturity whilst you are living with your parents? Do they not teach you anything?

I just get frustrated. I feel like I have been through a lot in my life, and although in no way has my life been harder than anyone else’s, my life has been a challenge for me, which I have so far overcome. Last year, something major happened to me, and it affected everyone around me in my life. When it first happened, I really didn’t know how I was going to feel normal again. My mum’s favourite saying is, “this too shall pass”, but at that point in time I didn’t see how it was going to. I think that was one of the biggest things I have had to overcome. But now, more than a year on, I can look back on it and think, “I have properly moved on.” I don’t know if I can say I am over it, because some things are so major that there will be a tiny scar left forever, but as long as the scar is healed- you can still see it, but only the faint memory.

I don’t think my point here is that clear. What I think I feel about something like this is that, sometimes I feel that people haven’t really been through a lot. Lucky them! Seriously, to lead a charmed life must be amazing. But I think sometimes people need some kind of hardship to make them think, “Ok, I’m going to be a better person now.”

I by no means whish ill on ANYONE. No one should have to go through major stuff. But I think life is, for many people, a series of challenges that you must overcome, and when you come out the end of every challenge, you come out a little bruised and scared, but you eventually become a much better person.

I may look back at this post in 5 years and think, “Mate, I was an ARSE back then!” And that’s ok. Because as life goes forward, so do I.

:D